Your Online Source For Hilarious One Liners, Funny One Liners, One Liners, Jokes
My boyfriend and I are making a funny saw video. Does anyone know where I can get the quote, "Hello, I want to play a game" in the Saw voice?
I use frostwire instead of limewire.. and I couldn’t find anything!
4th ODI Ausrtalia vs New Zealand, Adelaide Oval 10th Feb 2009 Stevo, secretly filmed. in his natural environment, front row at Adelaide Oval wih gray nicolls wide brimmed hat and hussey-esqe fluro zinc, drinking apple pop tops mixed with pepsi max and mid-strength beer, drunk and loud, abusing everything in sight. Keep a look out for the catchy one liners such as the over-used ‘FAG’ , ‘BOO’ , ‘HIT A BIG DIRTY SIX’ and crowd favourite ‘BAA-RAM-EWE” along with comical quips about his apparent pregnant female sheep that Josh is rather fond of. Slurring speech, glassy eyes, he has it all. Apologetic, as he unsuccessfully attempts to give a fellow supporter out hard earned beer money to compensate fo spilling some beer on him and his 13yo kid and for his apparent ‘hanging shit’ on all and sundry. The child was visibly traumatized but lived, the was donated to the bushfire appeal. Stevo spewed on the way home next to an RBT. No sheep were harmed in the filming of this video, although if any Kiwis were around im sure they died a little on the inside.
A compilation of funny and/or cute scenes from the third season of Criminal Minds. I OWN NOTHING
One of the best parts about the tanker mission in MGS2 is saving with Otacon. In the first MGS, Mei Ling would save your game and give you a Chinese proverb. Otacon…apparently has serious problems with metaphors. Recipe? Hilarious! I saved as much as I could to try and get them all. I think I’m only missing ONE which goes – Otacon: OK — “A frog in a well knows not of the great ocean.” Hey, I don’t like this one at all. Trapping a little frog in a well? That sucks, that’s really cruel. Of course it’s not going to see the big blue sea the lack of sunlight alone will kill it pretty quick. Sure, locking someone up is a good way to make sure they don’t see what you don’t want them to. But this is a terrible saying, and I don’t like it at all. Poor little froggy…! Snake: …I really think you’ve got this one wrong. There’s so much to love in these quotes I can’t even point out specific lines. 
Just that this is five billion times better than Rose nagging you endlessly about your relationship when you save as Raiden. D: SHUT UP ROSE. SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP.
I ‘ve used "House of Bacon, what’s your beef?" and "Miss Kitties House of pain, what’s your pleasure?"
Who’s there? Pete and Brian. Pete and Brian who? Pete and Brian, Comedy Companions. Buy some shuper shweet t-shirts at www.districtlines.com/peteandbrian winner of the 2007 MySpace Short Film Contest official selection of the 2007 CineVegas Film Festival, the 2008 Slamdance Film Festival, and the 2008 SXSW Film Festival shot by Jack Ferry written by Jacob Fleisher www.peteandbrian.com http www.jacobfleisher.com
I am looking for very short one liners (very important).
Clean or dirty. Just as long as it is funny! 
I have been asked to be the "best man" at my younger brothers wedding, and while i am honoured to be asked, i am having problems putting together a suitable speech.
I would really appreciate any advice on content & structure, also any other tips for presenting it. Also what are the funniest "one liners" you have heard in a speech?
Thanks in advance…..
I really loved and appreciated his work. I pray, he rests in perfect peace.
The quote i remembered from him, is from his stand up routine where he always said "i ain’t scared of you…", "I’m big boned-ed".
I love you Bernie!!!!!
Farewell, you will be missed
Conductors can be funny.
